Monterey Transportation Lies!


Written by Isabella Rowntree, Satirist


(article may include fake news to varying extents)


When tourists walk the streets of Monterey, looking in gift shops and trying to find the entrance to the Aquarium, they are greeted by the warm welcome by “the trolley’s” free public transportation system. Do not be fooled so quickly dwellers of Monterey. What the city wants their customers to believe is a lie and a marketing scheme. Our sources tell us that these so called “Trolleys” are actually busses in disguise.


I, a citizen of the Monterey Peninsula, was appalled the day I looked close to see no cables connecting these “Trolleys”  to the ground. I felt as though my whole life had been a lie. I am not the only one who feels this way. A local pedestrian gave this comment: “When I figured it out, I felt as though something had been taken away from me. As if I were slightly less American.”


As the truth spreads, the real question we should be asking is: What made the local government so inclined to lie to their citizens, and what made them believe the people would never notice?


Was is marketing that prompted this rash governmental decision? When questioned, local governmental officials gave no comment leading the press to assume they have been behind this scam all along. Busses have been driving around as trolleys for far too long, and it is time for a change. The government has been ripping the public off for too long. It is only a matter of time before San Francisco gets involved, possibly suing Monterey’s public transportation system for false advertisement.


Although many facts about this scandal are unknown or unverified, the people must stand together during this time of corruption. We will be silent no more. California as a whole must stand together against this crime to prevent this trolley scandal from spreading to more important areas including but not limited to: Sacramento, San Jose, and Pacific Grove.